We Chose Alternative Careers For These Bollywood Celebs!

Thank you Instagram for revealing more about this generation of heroes & heroines and everything in between we always wanted to know. Thanks to social media, here’s a curated list of alternate careers we came up with for our favourite stars. Sorry, sun, not you. 1. Ranveer Singh Loud and likeable, Ranveer Singh embodies a Bollywood hero in and out of his films. How would he perform his job, say if he was a door to door salesman? Very well we say! He would make a great salesman, giving the job 100%, even if he is selling printing paper. Whatever it takes to hold your attention, he’ll do it. And you will still buy the paper when you don’t even have a printer, just to get him to vamoos off your front door. 2. Katrina Kaif Her ‘barely there’ social media presence is just the detox we need. She will be excellent in running an exclusive business that teaches clients how to live a complete and fulfilling life without thirsting for likes and hearts and re-tweets. Pay her enough, and she’ll throw in a workout plan for free. 3. Salman Khan He will most likely run a business. A business in what you ask? Something related to fitness, perhaps. No one knows what exactly it is that he does but everyone knows he gets it done and makes a lot of money doing it. Or a gym, he’ll simply run a gym. 4. Karan Johar We’ve seen enough of KJ loving every bit interested in listening to stories about others. He is the Bollywood version of every 'pados wali' aunty dealing in Tupperware and gossip. He’ll sell you his Tupperware and listen to your scandalous fights with the maid while he’s at it. And he will laugh at you in secret because your fight wasn’t scandalous at all and he knows your life is duller than a plastic bag drifting through the wind wanting to start again. 5. Jacqueline Fernandez Hottie Mcbody is inspiring from top to bottom. She will excel as an Instagram fitness model, with over 10,000 followers who equally envy and love her for the same reasons; her ability to smile while doing the most twisted yoga asanas. She’ll advertise a ton of ‘slim teas’, none of which have anything to do with her abs. But if the tea pays the rent, then call us chai point. She’s obviously made out of glitter and goodness. 6. Kangana Ranaut No way can Kangana touch a stone and not turn it into gold. She will be a real life queen (which is not a ‘job’ technically but potato, potato) running a country of curly haired citizens heavily invested in the shampoo and conditioner business. The country’s best exports will be called ‘Kangana n Shoulders’, ‘Ranautene’, and ‘Kango’real’! 7. Shah Rukh Khan It’s hard to imagine a Bollywood without King Khan. Which is why, any alternate career we think of will have him be the best there is in that biz. Musician? Shahrukh Khan will be our answer to Sting, a rocker that never ages. Chef? Watch him be judge 1, 2 and 3 on his own reality cooking competition show. Flower pot? He will bloom the biggest, most fragrant flowers as the best damn pot in your balcony. Can you think of other alternative careers for these jaded celebrities?

Zoya Ghosh

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