Drunk Text Fails

Drunk Text Fails 1 The Drunken Plea for Help We would like to make friends with this person so that we can text them when we're drunk; we like their style. 2 The Hidden Code Ladies and gentleman, we present you with the Da Drunky Code. May you all b inG gopod. 3 The Ass-Dial to the Parents Ladies and gentlemen let this be a cautionary tale. Friends don't let friends butt-dial drunk. 4 The Incomprehensible Tone We've all been drunk on babies . . .right? I mean, who can resist when they have Sprinkles odf sugar on their tasters? 5 The Drunk Sext A great example of how not to sext. Line of the day: "I'll be your god." 6 The Clever Pop Culture Reference We're pretty sure this is a very clever drunken play on the Gotye song "Somebody That I Used to Know". See what he did there? So do I, welcome to the Drunk Text Hall of Fame. 7 It's On the Tip of My Tongue Look at the line breaks and the length of the messages, this is clearly a work of drunk poetry. This guy is a regular Maya AngeBOOZE, or maybe William ShakesBEER, Alan GUINNESSBerg, or how about Pablo NeBREWda? Okay, sorry, those were all terrible. 8 The Conscientous Friend It takes a good friend to punch you in the face for the right reasons. 9 The Mother Concerned About Alcohol When your mom sends you drunk buttchugging texts you should . . . wait a minute, we have no way to ever possibly finish that sentence. 10 The Fake Drunk Text This is way past the character limit for a text message, some internet comedian is trying to pull a quick one on us. 11 Dad Shows Son How to Party When your dad let's you know that you're not good at partying . . . shame is not a strong enough word. 12 The Text from a Hiding Place I have a feeling Tiffany did not successfully hide from the cops. Although it kind of sounds like she was trying to hide the cops . . .? 13 The Blind but Functioning Drunk We've never literally drank until we couldn't see straight, but this dude has. Either that, or his friend has the superpower of invisibility. Let's consult Occam's Razor on this one . . . 14 The Relationship Ruiner We wish we could live triumph. 15 Aunt Flo? We're trying to read between the lines here; is this drunk-speak for that special time of the month?

13 The Blind but Functioning Drunk

Murtaza Rangwala

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